The art of living is to know when to hold fast and when to let go. For life is a paradox: it enjoins us to cling to its many gifts even while it ordains their eventual relinquishment. The rabbis of old put it this way: “A man comes to this world with his fist clenched, but when he dies, his hand is open.”

　　生活的艺术在于懂得什么时候追求，什么时候放弃。因为生活就是一个矛盾体：它要我们紧紧抓住它赐予我们的生命之礼，然后最终又让它们从我们手中跑掉。老先生们说：“人们紧握着拳头来到这个世界上，离开这个世界时却摊开了双手。”

　　Surely we ought to hold fast to life, for it is wondrous, and full of a beauty that breaks through every pore of God’s own earth. We know that this is so, but all too often we recognize this truth only in our backward glance when we remember what it was and then suddenly realize that it is no more.

　　当然我们应该紧紧把握生活，因为它美妙得不可思议，充满了从上帝的每个毛孔里蹦出来的美。我们都清楚这一点，但我们常常只有在回首往事时才会想去过去，才会突然意识到过去永远地消逝了，才会承认这个道理。

　　We remember a beauty that faded, a love that waned. But we remember with far greater pain that we did not see that beauty when it flowered, that we failed to respond with love when it was tendered.

　　我们都记得美的褪去，爱的老去。但我们更痛苦地记得美正艳时，我们却没有发现，爱正浓时，我们却没有回应。

　　Here then is the first pole of life’s paradoxical demands on us: Never too busy for the wonder and the awe of life. Be reverent before each dawning day. Embrace each hour. Seize each golden minute.

　　这就是生活对我们自己自相矛盾要求的第一步：永远不要因为忙碌而忽略了它的奇妙和庄严。对即将到来的每一天，我们都要心怀敬意，拥抱每一小时，抓住每一分钟。

　　Hold fast to life... but not so fast that you cannot let go. This is the second side of life’s coin, the opposite pole of its paradox: we must accept our losses, and learn how to let go.

　　抓住生活，但不要抓得太紧，以至你放不下手。这就是生活像硬币一样也有另一面，也是生活矛盾的另一极：我们必须接受放弃，并且学会怎样让它过去。

　　This is not an easy lesson to learn, especially when we are young and think that the world is ours to command, that whatever we desire with the full force of our passionate being can, nay, will, be ours. But then life moves along to confront us with realities, and slowly but surely this truth dawns upon us.

　　学会这些并非易事。特别是年少轻狂的时候，我们自认为是世界的主宰者，认为只要充满激情地全力追求，就可以得到一切。然而，事实并非如此。只有在面对种种现实时，我们才会渐渐明白这个道理。

　　At every stage of life we sustain losses—and grow in the process. We begin our independent lives only when we emerge from the womb and lose its protective shelter. We enter a progression of schools, then we leave our mothers and fathers and our childhood homes. We get married and have children and then have to let them go. We confront the death of our parents and our spouses. We face the gradual or not so gradual waning of our strength. And ultimately, as the parable of the open and closed hand suggests, we must confront the inevitability of our own demise, losing ourselves as it were, all that we were or dreamed to be.

　　在人生的各个阶段，我们都会蒙受损失——并且在这一过程中成长。只有在脱离母体失去庇护所时，我们才会开始独立地生活。我们不断地升学，接着又离开父母，离开儿时的故乡。继而，我们结婚生子，然后又放手让自己的子女出去闯荡。随着父母和配偶的相继离世，我们也逐渐或者很快衰老。最终，正如双手张开与紧握这一寓言所说，我们必须面对自身的死亡，失去原来的自我，失去我们拥有过或者憧憬过的一切。